Stuff That Makes Me Hate White People #1

In this series, I will discuss my interactions with white people and the effects it has on my perception of them. As all of our faithful blog readers already know, Gary has been tackling the issue of white people and their enjoyment of a variety of things since the beginning of this blog. In this series I will attempt to write as an embedded correspondent and expose the darker side (not skin color) of white people.

Show Etiquette

As a member of the white community, it is obligatory to frequent a variety of concerts. The only problem at most of these concerts/shows is that they are usually populated by white, suburban, high school kids. Now it wasn’t so long ago that I was a member of this group, so you might be thinking “oh noes! troy has become a pretentious college student.” Fear not! I hated this group before I even came to college.

A concert, especially if it is a “rock concert” provides to suburban white high school kids a place to “rebel.” Get a couple bags of oregano and this community will make you a rich man. Why you may ask? Because it makes them feel rebellious buying what they think is an illegal drug. This rebellion unfortunately also takes the shape of just being the biggest asshole you can be to everyone around you. For example, I attended a Hives show last year where a kid, who fit the description of the “white suburban high school asshole” so well that he could’ve been their spokesman, continuously thrust his shoulder into my back. I knew it wasn’t a case of the crowd behind him pushing him into me and that he was in fact doing this on purpose. I turned around to confront the whipper snapper only to feel an arm come from behind me close in around my neck the instant I did so. I unceremoniously pushed this assailant off only to find myself surrounded by 4 or 5 other members of the “community.” I debated Mike Vallelying them, but decided I’d rather enjoy the rest of the show instead.

This example doesn’t just show the love of being rebellious but exemplifies another issue at shows: the overwhelming disrespect for other people’s space. I realize that often the venue is packed and there is little space to begin with, but that doesn’t excuse most of the behavior I’m talking about.

I went to a Girl Talk show this past weekend which exemplified almost everything I hate about suburban white shows. I went under the impression that it was being held somewhere in Boston, which is still overwhelmingly white but is comprised of college students so it’s slightly better. The show was in fact in Foxborough, a town that is only known for the Patriots football stadium, which happened to be the location of the show. As we drove up and saw where the show was being held and how many cars were in the parking lot, my wonderful friend Susan exclaimed “I feel like we’re at a Britney Spears concert.” That feeling wasn’t subdued when we walked into the venue to see a bunch of white teenage girls dancing around on stage with this opening act, supplemented by projections of “booty cleavege” behind them.

Despite this being a dance driven show, the audience still insisted on pushing each other around and fighting to get to the front. This led to one girl pushing into my aforementioned girlfriend and when she pushed back, the girl wheeled around and yelled “you fucking bitch” and looked like she was about to swing. Her BF intervened and pulled her away. I on the other hand was excited to see an intense pummeling handed out by my girlfriend.

All these bad experiences at suburban white kid shows? What is the remedy?

Find 90’s rap groups that the hipsters haven’t already gotten a hold of, find when they are coming to a venue near you, and go to it. Last year I went to an EPMD show with the (now infamous) Gary. They are an awesome group who experienced most of their success in the 90’s and still have somehow managed to avoid being swarmed upon by hipsters. The audience was primarily black and in their late 20’s/30’s. Everyone was respectful of everyone else’s space while still being energetic and dancing. It was one of the best atmospheres I’ve ever experienced, which I attribute to the fact that I was the only suburban white kid there.

tl;dr don’t go to shows that are going to be dominated by white suburban kids.



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